Very tired...

This week has been crazy and I'm very tired.  Thank you God for Fridays!

Elliptical hell....

Yesterday, Celine and I went to the gym.  She had been wanting to go for a few weeks and with my sick family, I'd been unable to accommodate her.  At lunch, we set out and I showed her around the Payne Center, changed, and made our way up to the work-out room.

It was a decision between the bike and the elliptical machine.  I decided to give the elliptical a try (again), so I showed Celine how to get going and away we went for 15 mins (plus the 3 min cool-down).  I made sure I wasn't jarring my neck, my shoulders weren't camping out on my ears and my ears weren't camping out on under my eye-balls.  I was only able to do the arms back and forth for about 7 mins then I had to hold onto the stationary bars and just do the legs.  The left arm motion was starting to make my neck hurt.

When we finished, we made our rounds to the wisteria room and showed her how things worked and promised to be her coach on a round, as I can't do the weight machines for now.  Then down to shower and back to work.

I felt pretty good.  My legs were sore, but of course that was natural since I hadn't really used any of those muscles in anything other than yoga.  Around 3PM I noticed my neck was killing me, and I was so sleepy, I was having a hard time staying awake.  I had planned on staying for a while to catch up on some work, but I was hurting to bad and so sleepy.  The drive home was scary.  It was as if my neck was causing me to need to sleep.  I finally made it home, ate a baked potato because I couldn't do anything else, took some meds, and literally laid down on the floor.  I just couldn't go another step.  I finally got up about 30 mins later, and set down in the recliner, turned on the tv (7PM) and the next thing I knew my momma said "sister why don't you go to bed?" I looked at the time, 8:30PM, I'd slept for an hour and a half.  I told her no, I needed to stay awake to take the dogs out at 9PM for their nightly constitutionals.  I fought sleep for the next 30 mins.  I finally took the dogs out, changed and went to bed.  I slept all night.  I didn't move from the spot I went to sleep in!

My neck is SORE this morning, but the body is fine.  I'm not sure if the exercise caused the sleepiness, or the hurting neck.  I've never had that happen after exercise nor after my neck starts hurting, so I'm not sure what the deal was (is).

Nevertheless, I'm hoping it was a fluke and I was just tired from last week, as I plan on trying another 15 mins on the elliptical tomorrow, as I have yoga tonight, need to save the legs.  If it does it again, I'm calling my neck doc to see what is going on!

Until tomorrow or Monday, whenever I get back to this blog...have a blessed day.

the Broncos vs the Pats

 vs

Ok, please understand that I LOVE the Broncos, and Tim Tebow doesn't hurt that none, smile.  I've never really been a fan of the Pats, ever, and I don't expect I'll start anytime soon.

I watched the Broncos run over my Steelers, whom I dearly love (Go Big Ben!), and I always grab me a yellow towel when they play so I can have a 'terrible towel' too, laugh.

When I realized the Broncos had to get through the Pats to 'win' their division, my heart sank.  Really Broncos, I'm rooting for you and I'll be there 'til the end, but you guys just aren't in the same 'league' as the Pats.

My superbowl predicts, for all it's worth, the Cheeseheads vs the Pats; and it's gonna be one heck of a game.  (Go Cheeseheads!)

Until next Saturday - TRAIN HARD BRONCOS!  I'd love for you guys to prove me wrong!!!!!!!!!!!!

Football rules, basketball drools....

MRI results

I met with my doctor early this morning, and the news isn't good.  I have to decide whether or not to have neck surgery.  When I was rear-ended C5 slipped off of C6 and is pinching the nerve creating massive headaches and my left arm to hurt and go numb. Add to it a crack in the lamina of C7 and life isn't easy.

The pain will become worse, if I don't have the surgery, so....

This all because a 19 year old driver wasn't paying attention to the traffic ahead of her.

I've been ban for everything other than yoga (but no headstands), thank God I love yoga (and I don't do headstands anyway), smile.

I'll let everyone know what I decide/when I decide it.  I'm still just trying to digest everything.  This wasn't the results I was expecting, not at all!

Prayers would be good, I think....

Dazed and confused....

The first post of the new year....

I spent Christmas Eve and Christmas Day (morning) with my extended family.

On the way over, I drove by my cousin's grave site.  I never do grave sites, as it's just the body, not the soul, so I really don't see the need, but I stopped.  And to my surprise I stood their with the biggest smile on my face.  Why?  My Aunt and Uncle had placed a christmas tree at her head and flowers at her feet.  The christmas tree lights would come on at dusk and stay on for 6 to 8 hours, then go off.  Teresa would've loved it!

The festivities weren't quite the same without her.  There was definitely a void. A void that nothing, but God, can fill.

It was then and there that I began to think about the coming New Year.  I wish for my family, peace, health, understanding and love - one for another.

The New Year holds all the promises as the past year, if we follow God's lead.  Teresa received her promise and is with God.  Now we have to continue to follow God as He gets us ready to meet Him.

Happy New Year to everyone and may you and your families find the peace and love that only comes from above.

May God Bless!

My results from visiting Dr. P at SB&J yesterday....

My appt was at 9:15.  I signed in at 9:10, I'm not arriving any sooner 'cause they aren't on-time so why should I be?!  And the wait began....

The wait, well let's just say I got about 2 hours of work done in the waiting room.  Then I was called back into the room, and opened my lap top to begin my wait (again!) and in walks Dr. P.  My jaw almost hit the floor; one, because he was fast, and two, because he was GORGEOUS!

He started asking questions, I answered, he immediately found my bad right knee (not what I was there for, but he was so concerned because he couldn't figure out what was holding the knee together, laugh), then he was kind and didn't probe on my neck (thank you Dr. P!) and ordered an MRI for next Thursday on both the neck and knee.  NO RUNNING and NO STANDING ON YOUR HEAD IN THOSE YOGA POSITIONS he said, not until we see the MRI.  I laughed, told him not to worry about standing on my head, I can't do that anyway.  He smiled, I know I was drooling!

He told me I could do the stationary bike, rowing machine, and try some weights, and yoga, but no pushing though any discomfort.  (You push through the discomfort in yoga, but not the pain, so now I'm suppose to reach the discomfort and stop, ok, I'll try that....)  I laughed, I told him I couldn't do weights 'cause they hurt my hands/arms from the arthritis and fibro.  He said I was too young for all that, I agreed and asked him if he'd like to speak to my rheumatologist?  He said seriously, I said as a heart attack.  He backed off, and it's a good thing he did, I'm touchy about that.  I may look healthy on the outside, but live in my body one day and you'd take almost drastic measures to end the pain!

I was getting ready to turn on the charm when he rolled his chair back and said, you didn't come in here for this, but let me help you.  I know runners carb load, so stop carb loading.  I said, I have not loaded since the wreck, no need in it, no running, no need for the energy.  He said no carbs then, it will help you pull off the weight while you're sedentary, exercise doesn't make you lose weight.  Ok, I know that statement should've sent me running the other way, but dang he was cute and I needed that MRI on my neck 'cause I need to run again, I just laughed, because if he knew how much weight I had lost because of exercise, he'd change his mind. And I have to remember, different strokes for different folks and this folk believes in exercise!

Anyway, back to the charm, he said, I eat no carbs during the week but on Sunday I eat whatever I want with my kids.  GOD!  He had to bring kids into the equation.  No charm for him!  And I was so hoping....

Then like that, he was gone and I was on my way downstairs to set up the MRI appt.

One day, one day, maybe, I'll find that someone I can turn on the charm for and it will work...laugh.

Until Thursday though, I have to continue to deal with the neck pain and constant headache...say a prayer for me, it's taxing - mentally and physically.  I'm really exhausted from hurting 24/7.

Merry Christmas!

In memory of Teresa Maye Stewart....

Final good-byes are always hard, especially when it's someone you were close to, and you grew up with, and the memories are so vivid, it's as if they happened only yesterday.

I see Teresa's smiling face every time I close my eyes, or stop and think about her. Or when I do something that brings back a memory.  Of all the family I've lost, for some reason Teassie is staying with me.  I'm not sure why, and I sure can't explain it, but I feel her.  On some level it's very erie, but then I remember to use my spiritual eyes and know it's okay.  When I think about her, tears fill my eyes, both out of happiness for her peace with God and sorrow because I miss her and all of her quirkiness.

Teassie lived with her pack of 12 German shepards, and made sure she saw her mother every day (or at least spoke to her).  She protected herself from this world as best she could, especially after having men she loved beat on her.

She helped every one she could, even when they stabbed her in the back (and even when she knew the knife was coming, she still helped) hoping she could be a light and they would change for the better.

She never met a stranger, and I mean NEVER!  She was a Ravencraft with a mouth, and the Long (her father's last name) was only seen in her facial features.  She only ate chicken breast when we had chicken and we always saved her one because she was always late for the gathering due to working or helping someone.  She always wanted momma to make potato salad and she would grab the bowl and run, laugh.

This time she wasn't late, and I ate more chicken breasts than I care to admit in her honor (and I don't like white meat from a chicken, too dry, laugh).

Her IQ was higher than anyone I ever met, literally.  She finished high school at 16 and was teaching the teachers, she could've been anything, anyone she wanted to be, yet she stayed close to her momma, as all of us Ravencraft's tend to do.  We won't be too far from our family, if we can help it!

I could go on and on, but you'd have to know Teassie to understand what I write, and I could write a book.

God knows I miss her, more than words or actions can say, but knowing her life, I wouldn't call her back for nothing in this world.

Death is final, in this life, but memories are forever!

I hope and pray she never leaves me.  I would be honored if she was the one to walk with me to the other side.

I love you Teresa!